I open my diary, and i begin writing again, and almost the story in my diary is about my relation with Bayu, my boyfriend who has closed with me for 2 years.My story with Bayu begins on Oktober.I know him from my friend.He is a son of my headmistrees in my school.When the first sight i saw him, i feel that i resfect him.
Closing i like him , but I realized that he is younger than me.So I sent away the feeling.Two months later, her mother askes me to giving hin some exercise about English, because he will follow police test.So after that i always meet him.In that meeting, I fell that he has a same feeling to me.He cares to me.Until on November he askes me tobe his girlfriend.
Absolutely I agree because I love him from the first i saw him.I enjoy with the relation, i feel that i am the happinest lady in the world, until he gets the job be a police I feel the different of him.I never find the careness of him again and the worst is he gets affair with another girl beside me.Unfortunately, his mother who always support my relation with him was died on april so nobody support me again refers his father and his sister who never accept me be a part in their family.So whe i told about bayu's affair they dont give me any suggestion.I told the problem to luki, bayu's friend.He gives suggestion to give him chance.and finally i give it though my heart is hurt and relly hard to forgetting all his affair.I do the relation again but my trustness is dissapear.I askes inn my heart.
Is it love? i dont knowin next part in my relation, someday bayu told to me that his sister told him to thinking again to continue our relation.She told that i stil childish and i have different characteristic with him.And something that make me sad that his sister told that i have a bad attitude.I can stay in his home without a sakral relation like wife and husband.Even they know that i ever stay there because i look after their mom when she was sick for a long time.
And I stay there because their mother askes me to accompanying always because she can share all the problem with me.Then i ask in my buttom in my heart, why do they talk about this now, not in that time that i am caring their mom.I am really upset.My heart is hurt again not only because him but because his family too.....sO I THINK THAT How big my love to him not enough tobe a tool of make real my drem to make a family with him.
Though I find something better in his attitude to me nowadays, i find his love again, but i feel it is still less to keep this relation, because i belive something that when we get married with someone we married not only with our couple but we married with his family too.And know i find that his family dont love me, so this is be reason to me to leaved him because i dont want feeling be a small things again and be a useless people in their eyes.So when people says that love can loose everything, i dont think so.......
by Yuliana
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